Blog Description

This blog is solely meant for the purpose of blogging. No, seriously. Disclaimer. Do leave a tag if you do play DotA. I would love to have a friendly match with you.

About Me

Aaron a.k.a Turtle
Loves her <3
14 years old.
10/01/1993
short and sweet ^^

Links

Yan Jun <3
Apple =]
Link

Archives

June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 June 2008 October 2009 November 2009

Tagboard


Music

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Skin by: sixseven
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Sunday, November 29, 2009

Ever know what it feels like to see your loved ones feel so fucked up yet you are unable to do anything about it? Well, i do. I'm practically useless. I cannot do anything at all to improve the situation. All i can do is sit by the side and watch. Well, fuck that. I have gotta endure this. =/ Worst few days of my life. I'm down with a bad sore throat and it isn't exactly the most comfortable sensation. I have a tired aching body, i'm growing fat again -.-. Wth, down period much. Hopefully things get better soon. Especially for my loved ones.


Cougara blogged at 2:27 PM



Monday, October 05, 2009

Finally, i doubt anyone comes here anymore.. i can blog i guess. So much has happened. Life can really screw you over when you try to screw it. I lost something dear to me. Not facing the loss very well. I don't know what to do anymore. People tell me the priorty is to study. Heck, i know that. Haven't I been trying harder? I really am. I bet everyone's experienced this feeling before, being afraid. Fear of losing something forever, but do we still say that when something new comes along to replace it? I haven't the determination to drop everything, but neither am i gathering the courage to carry on. I'm standing in the middle, not knowing what to do. But actually, i do know what i want to do, just don't have the courage. How can everyone be so brave? While i'm sitting alone here crying? I've always hated feeling so weak, but i am remaining weak. Can i grow stronger? What if I have a change of heart? I keep asking myself, I really cannot afford that. I'm tired, but i lack the support i need. I'm troubled, but i don't know who to confide in. The distance between us grows. I'm tired of a lot of stuff. Like how i'm always the number one target. I don't know who's right and who's wrong. I always thought i was one of better judgement, how wrong i was. I now see things clearer, how everything is not how it seems. I don't know what i want in this life anymore. I don't know how to live it, neither do i know what my future holds. I can't say i'm going to end it, so i just gotta walk on, even if i don't know what awaits me. And if the someone i hold dear as mentioned above, and if you ever read this, i'll be waiting.


Cougara blogged at 6:05 AM



Monday, June 02, 2008

I just sit in my chair. Feeling so empty without you. As i read your blog, i felt the guilt in lying to you. I really thought you would be happier. You made it seem you were unhappy with feelings for me. So i had to lie, so you would be happy. I never knew it would turn out this way. Please forgive me. I can't forget you. Really i can't.. =/

I hate my life. Too complicated. Can't i just love her in peace?



Cougara blogged at 7:40 PM



Saturday, February 09, 2008

The turtle speaks again! o.o Sometimes, i honestly disappoint myself. In every area possible. I looked in the mirror and reflected upon myself. I have done things to disappoint my friends, my family and myself. I myself, cannot believe i have done such stupid things. Perhaps i expect too much out of others and myself. I really want to just break down, break away from these horrid feelings. Perhaps this is growing up. Or maybe not. I just feel a whole mixture of horrible feelings. I'm too lazy to further elaborate. Die, me.

o.o emo turtle.


Cougara blogged at 4:18 AM



Saturday, January 26, 2008

I haven't been blogging of late. But i have been rather interested in poetry. So here goes a simple one.

A simple poem.

My dying heart struggles to live,
to tell the tale of my love so true.
To love is to give and receive,
but all i got was my heart cut into two.
Alone in my room i fall to my knees,
to silently retell my story of a foolish love.
Until the day my heart is set free,
i am nothing but a trapped, loveless, dove.
The tears don't stop flowing,
they just trickle down my face.
Sitting in a corner with thoughts lingering,
gazing deeply into the dark blank space.
I thought of my reunion with you.
but it is but a distant dream.
Slowly, these thoughts dwindle to a few,
For they are more impossible then they seem.
I would love to have a pure, unbroken heart,
but it has already been shattered.
A form of the finest abstract art,
a heart that is torn and tattered.
Was it my fault for loving too deeply?
For believing too much in you?
I chose to believe your words so empty,
Now i suffer the consequences due...


Cougara blogged at 6:56 AM



Monday, December 10, 2007

Alright. Countless have already proclaimed my blog dead. With the extravagance of Chaos, he even sent flowers. I sincerely thank him. Sometimes, i think being a samurai or slayer would be really cool. Lack of emotions. Killing without mercy. Living by a code of honor. Satsugaisha.That's the Japanese term for Slayer. Its a joint term owned by me and my cousin. Enough of that. I have no idea what's going on in my life anymore. Contradictions. A simple word to sum it all up. Go figure. I don't know anything anymore.. Anyway, i think i have made a breakthrough with my cousin. He has a heart afterall. Random stuff i am blogging about.

SatsugaishaRon


Cougara blogged at 7:18 AM



Monday, November 12, 2007

The hypocrisy of this world is simply astounding. Worlds are promised but what is the point if you just don't mean it..? I may have been a hypocrite, i do not know but i am trying to change. Honestly, i see many hypocrites in my life. They only bring me harm. I really don't know what this world is coming to. Sudden idea to blog. So i won't continue, so FFS, people, mean what you say.

hypocrisy.
aaron.


Cougara blogged at 9:56 PM